Uninspired

My trip to San Diego was pretty cool.  I can’t wait to go back.  Next time I want to have my own agenda though.  I’m not such a big fan of letting someone else make all the plans.  True, I didn’t know what there was to do, but I wasn’t super happy about having plans made that didn’t coincide with what little I was hoping to do.

Disneyland turned out to be better than I thought it would be.  Which is impressive, considering I was grumpy and exhausted most of the day.  I’d like to go back one day.  Just to enjoy it.  And to really look around.  It was cool being with people who could take us around to all the top rides (we did about 3 days worth of only 1).  Once again though, I’m not such a big fan of other people’s plans.

Maybe I’m just too much of a control freak?

On the bright side of things, I didn’t get sick of Jason.  For anyone that’s gone on a trip with me, I tend to need alone time around day 2 or 3.  But this time when I wanted time away from our other trip companions, I didn’t want time away from Jason.  I actually think the trip made me feel even closer to him.  I’m not sure how he feels about me though.

I haven’t felt very motivated about anything since I got back though.  If I think about it though, it’s understandable.  I worked 11 hours the day after I got back, the next day I worked 8 and went out for Jill’s birthday, Friday I worked another 8 hours then went to Jason’s, and today I worked another 8 hours.  And none of those shifts went by quickly.  But my room is a mess, and I made a fairly long To Do list today.  The problem is, I’m not really sure when I’m going to get stuff done.  I have some weird shifts this week.  Although, I will theoretically be getting up earlier this week, so perhaps I can get more done during the day (after all, I’ve always been quite productive in the late mornings).

Chapters has some really nice reed diffusers, eye pillows, frames, photo albums, cards, agendas, journals, etc.  I was quite impressed last night…and extremely tempted.  I only got an agenda though, which is something I will actually use.  And I based my decision on function, not solely on price.

A part of me is saying I should’ve gone back to work there.  But then nothing would’ve turned out the same.  And since I can’t change anything, I really shouldn’t worry about it.  For now the thought can simply hold a spot in my head.  After all, who knows what the future will bring?

I have come to the realization that for the most part, I am only working where I am because of the pay, and for one, the lack of effort required, and the other, mainly because of a couple staff members and my resume.  I’m really looking forward to the day when I can find a job that is mentally stimulating, a bit of a challenge, and one that I enjoy. 

I miss…yoga…getting dressed up with my hair and make-up done…doing my make-up…wearing heels all the time…being super photogenic…the days of blogging on Nexopia…Nexopia in general…sleeping well…my clean bedroom…seeing my friends lots…some of my friends that aren’t really friends anymore…having a plan…never crying…looking forward to going to work…being active…texting constantly…Roxie…Jessica…Jason…climbing…spending weekends together…feeling inspired…a lot. 

The camera on my cell is broken.  And the battery runs out way quicker than it used to.  I need to take it in to be fixed, but I don’t have time.

#34

I was tired around 11pm last night.  Tonight, it’s 11:20pm, and I’m still wide awake.  Just when I was thinking I might be wrong about my body not adjusting to the new sleep schedule.

All I seem to talk about now is my silly Sleep Schedule.  Meh.

Work went really well today.  Which is awesome.  I still find the library rather uneventful – it’s just not busy enough.

Hopefully tomorrow I can do some make-up.  Which means I should probably get to bed so I can get up.  Urgh.

So does anyone else want to start up a blog, or already have one I don’t know about?  I like reading them as well.  Comment if you have a link for me.  :-)  Or even if you don’t.

Traffic Circle of the Mind

It’s so weird.  Yesterday all I could do was complain about working at Pier 1.  Today I actually really enjoyed it.  And I enjoyed being with the people that usually drive me up the wall.  I don’t really understand why I’m all over the place.  Maybe it’s just because today I decided not to worry about the details.  That’s probably it.

I’m feeling really drained again.  It’s only 10:45pm, and I’m ready for bed.  A week ago I didn’t feel tired until midnight.  But I haven’t been sleeping very well the past couple of nights, so that doesn’t really help.

I did my make-up and hair today.  I was super excited, and loved every minute of it.  You can’t really see anything in the picture, but at least I remembered to take one.

Change Is On It’s Way

I have had “post a blog” on my To Do List for the past month.  I managed to get one entry up a couple weeks ago, but that’s pretty pathetic to my mind.  Perhaps I just have my expectations set too high, so I don’t even make an attempt.  That’s probably what it is actually – I always feel like I’m not putting forth my best effort if my post is shorter than 5 paragraphs or so.

This whole summer has been about change though, so I think changing my attitude towards blogging is easy enough to do.  Now I just want to post more often, with no expectations about length or content.  I’m also thinking I might use my cell phone to take pictures throughout the day (when it makes sense to), and upload those.  Just for something different.  Plus I’m thinking I need to post a link on my Facebook and Nexopia pages every time I post.  Having readers motivates me more.

I must say this is one of my better summers overall in terms of spending money (or in this case, not spending money).  It’s not that I’m not buying stuff, because I still am, I’m just a bit more selective.  So I usually get stuff that I will actually use.  And I’ve become much more dedicated about making up a list before I go.  Not that a list stops me from browsing and getting more than I need, but it does tend to minimize it a bit.

I’m also switching my credit cards around.  Because I want cards that have rewards that actually benefit me.  This was prompted when my CIBC Visa informed me the Shoppers Optimum Points option was being replaced by the Dividend/Cash Back option.  I don’t exactly use my card enough to get enough money back for it to be any use.  So I’ve gotten a Visa through Citizens Bank.  With every purchase, money is donated to a charity, and I earn points which can later be turned into yet another donation (and a tax receipt for myself).  That just makes way more sense to myself.  Now I’m trying to switch my BMO Mastercard with Airmiles for a Canadian Tire Mastercard so I can potentially get a free oil change a year instead of nothing with my Airmiles.  2 years, and there’s very little I can get with my points.

I miss doing my make-up differently everyday, and doing my hair.  Lately it’s just been some mascara and powder, and my hair up in a ponytail.  Exact same everyday.  I was putting a bit more effort into my make-up on the weekends, but I’ve been slacking off there too.  This is something else I want to change.  I’m going to make the effort to do one or the other, if not both.  It makes me feel good about myself.  Yea, I can feel good without them, but when you’re having a bad day, every little bit helps.

 

I had the day off work today, so I was actually able to get a lot accomplished.  It feels pretty good overall.  I’ve noticed I’m getting a lot more organized the older I get.  My room no longer has a huge pile in the middle.  I’ll put stuff on the floor sometimes, but it’s because I’d rather put it there than not put it away properly.  I also notice that when I feel stressed about something, any mess drives me absolutely bonkers and all I want to do is clean.

I managed to clean my fishes’ bowls tonight.  Well, to be honest I just changed the water.  Whenever I clean it, the chemical I add to neutralize the water makes the water go all murky.  And the fish make lots of bubbles that kind of crust on the top.  It’s very weird.  So essentially, I need to clean the bowls, put the water with the chemical in it for a day, and then put fresh water in so the fish don’t die.  Although they are pretty hardy fish.  They have to be with me.

Tonight is the first night of my Sleep Schedule.   I had to come up with something to help me prepare for 8am classes in the fall.  While the 8am part may not sound so bad, 1) I’m a night owl, and 2) I’m going to have to get up at 5:30am so I have time to get ready and catch the train.  But I’m not going to complain too much since I have no more than 3 classes a day, and I’m off by or before 3pm 3 days a week.

Now I think everyone who has read all of this should make me super happy and leave a comment (you don’t need an account or anything.)  Please?!